Strange is human life. In the smallest of moments a single life can be changed, may it be for good or bad, or it can even be taken. That can be said about all life. Humans just believe they are the rulers of all. Silly humans they are, all for believing that to be true. The truth is on Earth at least humans are never in truly full control of their own lives. Few humans will ever be told this. Even fewer will learn it on their own or from others. This is a sad truth that must be learned. I myself have learned this lesson many times in recent years. Those that fight hard are the ones who fail the hardest. Those who have big ideas, but have no support fail. Those who are given what they want rather than what they need have a fifty percent chance at making it. in those cases its because they were born with wealth. The other fifty percent fail because their family's are not well off. Even worse are those born with complicated medical issues. These don't have a shot in the world unless its a disease that is killing them. If its killing them they make it till their time alive is up. Those with diseases that don't kill, but simply hold the person back mentally or physically, punish without reason. Those people don't have a fighting chance at all in making it in life. For those a life changing event can kill them or raise them higher than they thought possible. Lack of understanding any of this can cripple anyone.
I am finding myself in the situation of not ever breaking even and I am still so young. Never shall my dreams be met and never will I know any life other than extreme poverty. A disease that does not kill is the worst kind when it affects you physically. Even worse is when people look at you and simply call you lazy. Not understanding is the worst part of being human. Trapped by love and obligations and by physical disabilities makes life impossible. Don't anyone tell me you know how it feels. No one but me knows how my life, my story feels. I am tired of life. I have endured two house fires in my life, I have endured three moves, thus change inwhere I call home. For once I want to decide what happens to me. Sadly I simply don't see that happening in my lifetime. I don't even know who I am anymore. So many ideas in my head. No way to bring my vision to life.
Living without your voice being heard is true pain. Knowing what is in your head might not be real or what others want to hear is painful. I am here for some reason I guess. There are many times I wish I was not here. Who cares anyways. There are millions of people on the Earth. Why does my life matter anyways? I am told all life matters. So with that said the question I ask is what is my life supposed to mean?